I haven’t been blogging nearly as much lately. Sorry. In addition to working myself to death, there are days when I don’t even check the regular sites, like emotionalaffair.org because I just don’t want to think about or analyze it anymore. It is what it is. It happened and I cannot change it. I still have days when the depression hits me hard but mostly I mutter on through. I just found out that someone I went to high school with committed suicide over the weekend leaving behind a wife and three kids. Up until last year I never would have been able to understand someone doing that, but now I know that kind of hopelessness and brokeness. I feel very blessed that I was able to get the help I needed during that time of my life and feel very fortunate that suicide was never an option to me. I could never to do that to my kids. My brother said that this couple was having financial problems and I know all to well that that goes hand in hand with marital problems. I guess that’s why I am suddenly getting very nervous for our immediate future. My husband’s contract ends in 8 weeks. I am praying that he finds another more permanent job before then because I don’t want to have to go through the strain of financial problems on our marriage again. But mostly, I just feel so sorry for this family whose lives are shattered. So sorry that the signs were either hidden or ignored. So sorry that someone felt that kind of pain that they put their young kids through such trauma. Nothing to do now but pray. God bless these people.
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