I have avoided this blog like the plague lately. It’s not that I don’t enjoy hearing from the friends I have made along the way, because I do. I read each and every comment and take them all to heart. It’s been nice knowing that I am not alone in my struggle. I guess lately I just haven’t needed or wanted to be reminded of the pain and heartache. I’ve stayed incredibly busy and have come to a better acceptance of what happened and a realization that it will never go away, and that’s ok. It’s just no longer a threat stalking me at all times. I guess that means I’m moving on. I haven’t had any really bad days in awhile now and that’s been great. I realize how lucky I am that I don’t have to ever deal with Diane. When I started this blog, I couldn’t even say her name. Didn’t want to accept that my husband was in love with her and hated me. But I took a good long look in the mirror and realized that I didn’t love him either. I just didn’t have the guts to leave and could not betray my children. I don’t know how we made our way back to each other, but I have no issues of not trusting him and I truly believe that he loves me more than anything and that he will forever regret the decisions he made in the past as much as I do. I don’t know what happened to make things turn around. I don’t think we can take credit for it at all. Some things are just out of our control. So if anyone’s reading this blog that has just started down this road, please know that there is hope and you won’t always feel this way. There will come a day when you will look back on these events and be grateful for the strength you somehow found. It will get better!
